2011 Women's Leadership Conference gets students ready to uncover their inner superwomen

On Thursday, 25 August, Student Village hosted the 2011 Women’s Leadership Conference (WLC) at Montecasino’s Il Grande. The conference began after all had eaten their fill of Nando’s, with MC, ‘CC’ Hulisani Ravele, announcing that the intention was to get all attendees to shift their perceptions and ‘rule the world’.

Ravele stated: “Before we get into the programme, I start off with one word for you – congratulations on being chosen to attend the conference today, based on the strength of your character, as well as your desire to succeed and to help others.” She explained that the line-up of guests would share stories of how they had uncovered their own superwomen and thanked the sponsors for making the event possible, adding “It was all brought together by Student Village’s ‘big daddy’, CEO Ronen Aires”. It was his birthday on the day so he said: “All I’ve ever wanted is to spend my birthday with 350 gorgeous women.” He stated that Student Village exists to carve a new future and address issues, make a difference and enrich lives; this conference exists to make students feel special and take time out from what is happening in their world. He said, “Your future doesn’t start next year when you enter the working world, but right now,” and shared Maya Angelou’s quote: “Don’t define your life by the number of breaths you take, but by the moments that take your breath away.”

Next, Ravele asked the audience “who believes they are superwoman?” She said, “Today, we’re here to share stories even when you need to dig deep to be that superwoman. You are not defined by where you come from, but by how you end the race and use the superpowers within.” The first speaker, Kensi Nobanda, shared her journey of uncovering her own superwoman during her 11 year career of marketing for top FMCG companies Unilever, Brandhouse and SAB.

In her first ‘superwoman’ role as a Wits graduate, Nobanda said she was a Powerpuff Girl, with powers like flight, super strength, super speed and x-ray vision, but who is reckless, stubborn and tough. At her first appraisal at Unilever as assistant brand manager for Rama, the realisation that what you put in is what you get out, finally rang true for her. She advised the students to always be clear about the type of things they want for themselves. Moving on, Nobanda said in the next stage of her career she became Kim Possible, who fights crime with her intelligence, but has a fiery and demanding personality, is stubborn and strong-willed, short fused and uses teen slang. She said key advice she learned during this time was, “it doesn’t matter how you do it, just do it.” In her next role, Nobanda embodied Wonderwoman, whose powers can be removed if she allows herself to be ‘chained’ by a man. She felt invincible during this stage of her career and learned, “my work is not my life,” when she was in the space to say, “I will get it to you, but I have a life as well”. She then moved on and became Mystique, who can change into someone else, but eventually reverts to her real self. She listed many dramatic and exciting experiences in her career, such as climbing a mountain in Ethiopia and how she cried when she reached the summit as she realised she needed to regain her love of marketing. Now, she is her own woman – she is passionate, knows herself, feels smart, balanced and resilient, but accepts that she still has a short fuse. Nobanda ended with the words, “You are not one thing and can’t be boxed in as one thing; you’ll be surprised by some of your powers; the core of you never changes; never, ever compromise yourself; and above all, accept that your life is much bigger than your career.” Ravele summed up Nobanda’s presentation by saying she is also learning that it’s OK to say ‘no’.

We then watched a TED video of a presentation by Eve Ensler of The Vagina Monologues fame. She spoke of trying not to be an outcome of her past and that as she had no reference for her own body, so she began asking other women about their own bodies and from the often-shocking stories, she began putting The Vagina Monologues together. It is all about the moments when women separate from their bodies, as she had done, but the stories Ensler heard in the DRC challenged everything she’d heard before. The holes in the women’s bodies were seen as the violation of war and Ensler said this saturated her soul; she stopped sleeping and the stories started to bleed together. And that’s when: “Cancer arrived like a speeding bird smashing into a window.” She likened the crisis in her body to the crisis in the world: “It was all these things in the water, the world, my body.” Ravele spoke after the video saying that as much as people have success in their lives, you need to understand the struggle each of us goes through to reach this: “As much as you see people smiling and looking great, everyone is fighting a battle. Things don’t just fall in your lap.”

This was followed by an interactive session with Donna McCallum, ‘the fairy godmother’. She started off her presentation with the ‘shift happens’ video to explain the current world we live in. She then walked on stage wearing her wings and told the students how to create their ideal lives “in the exciting times we’re living in”, by asking everyone to stretch and say ‘woohoo’, whether they were excited or scared about the statistics they had seen in the video. She shared the Woody Allen quote, that 85% of success lies in simply showing up, before elaborating on her personal account of living an extraordinary life by following eight steps. In the initial stages of her career, McCallum was what she calls “a sin marketer”, with alcohol, tobacco and life insurance as her main clients. One day she found herself sitting in her car wondering if this is what it’s all about, questioning the purpose and meaning of her way of life. She said that she believes in a universe that conspires with us, as she sold her business and decided to go travelling in South America. Five months into her trip, she was asleep on a night bus in Argentina on a long-distance trip when she woke up with the urge to write. So she got out her travel journal and the words flowed out of her, in an experience she likened to ‘vomiting herself up on the page’. She wrote over 50 pages, and in reading it back, two paragraphs showed her the purpose for her life. She had written “My deepest wish and dream is to help others believe in the power, magic and beauty of their dreams.” The little voice in her head – the same one that usually squashes our dreams – told her she was crazy, but she felt so excited. McCallum stated that there is not only huge power in our thoughts, but also in our speaking and the words we use in the world that create our realities. Following this experience, she sent an email out to her entire contact book, stating: “I’ve had an epiphany on a night bus in Argentina.” She now gets to live the most extraordinary life by helping the people who attend her workshops, adding: “Extraordinary people are merely ordinary people living their dreams. In life, the more you participate, the more you get out.”

McCallum then listed her eight tips for living such a life, starting with ‘be authentic’. Members of the audience had the opportunity to share what this means to them, with McCallum summarising their thoughts as: “Be real; be true to yourself and original; be confident enough to just be you.” She added that we often try to impress others by being different, but we need to give our own expression in the world as to what our individual truth is, and that in life, you quickly learn there are people who like you and people who don’t, and that this is absolutely fine. McCallum’s second tip was to play to your strengths – know your limits and potential. She added that we all need to learn to maximise ourselves, find out what we’re good at doing, and do that. She gave an example of Tiger Woods and golf: he was one of the lucky few who find their strength in childhood, as most of us only do so in our late teens and early twenties. McCallum presented a quick exercise to uncover our strengths. Think of the things you love, are passionate about and that excite you; things that make time speed up or slow down and that you can look back on and think ‘that was time well spent’. She explained that during those times, your soul lights up. Attendees were encouraged to quickly complete the sentence ‘My soul lights up when I ... ’ and share it with the person sitting next to them. At this point, McCallum noted, “the energy in the room has changed.” Her next step for success is to do what you love and love what you do, adding that it’s a lie when people say that you can’t make huge amounts of money by doing what you love. The next step is to realise that it’s your choice – you get to choose how you live your life. McCallum added that many students are still living their parents’ choices. She encouraged them to go and do what they love and make their own choices, as it is “when you live your own choices that you are empowered”. This step is followed by learning to learn and learning how best you learn as an individual. This leads to McCallum’s favourite step of ‘dreaming big’. She explained that while most people know of ‘smart’ goals, which are specific, measurable, attainable, relevant and timely, she prefers for people to aim for ‘wigs’ – wildly improbably goals. She shared the quote by Michaelango, stating that “the greatest danger for human beings is not that we aim too high and miss, but that we aim too low and make it.” McCallum then taught a relaxation technique in which attendees envisioned their 30th birthday parties. They then had two minutes to tell the person beside them about the wonderful things they saw and were encouraged to follow up the next morning by closing their eyes and jumping back into the story. Her final words of encouragement on the topic were to ‘conquer your fears’, adding that there are seven types of fear, which attendees could look up on her website, www.fairygodmotherinc.com. McCallum ended her session by stating that gratitude is the fuel for making dreams come true; she is grateful to do what she loves and lives an extraordinary life, and is grateful to be South African, with the changes we get to make. Ravele concluded the session by stating that the entertainment industry is one where we forget that the people who make you are the ones who can break you, encouraging attendees to always be grateful for even the small things done for them by others.

Following a tea break, Ravele played a video of women who are ‘doing it’ in their field, facing the daily struggles in their careers, who could not attend the conference in person, but still took the time to share their experiences. Dineo Manaka, known for her work in the local broadcast industry, encouraged attendees to “put a little spark in it”, while CNBC Africa’s Lerato Mbele described Africa as the new economic frontier, adding that being open to learning is an intrinsic need to succeed. Annie Malan, who started work at the age of 11 with a role in Fiela se Kind, said this had showed her the value of working hard and the responsibility that comes with the phrase, ‘don’t drop the ball’. She spoke of the power of individuality, stating, “I cannot fit into your mould, you cannot fit into mine.” Carol Manana of Radio 2000 said that some of the challenges she faced from her career were based on convincing people that she belonged in the male-dominated industry of sport broadcasting, stating that it is better to respond than to react to challenges, ending with the words, “you can’t be a successful person if you don’t read,” with each speaker sharing a list of books they recommend to young women starting their careers.

Ravele then introduced the next speaker, Lerato Matsenang, who is still in her early twenties, yet is already working on her second and third novels while working as a communication specialist. Matsenang started off her session by stating that as women, we hardly ever take the time to take a bow, then asked all present to stand and think of a moment where they had done something they never thought they would, and then take a bow for being aware of their accomplishments. She spoke of wanting to put her heart and soul into something in order to find out who she was, which is how she came to taking a ‘gap year’ near the start of her career – she then sat down and wrote her first romance novel, Love on the Menu, in just three weeks. Matsenang challenged attendees to find their own unique selling point (USP) and to work on that, stating “ ... when it pains you in your stomach and you can’t sleep at night, follow it.”

This was followed by a graduate panel where recent graduates who had entered the working world shared advice in an open question and answer session. The next speaker was Nonkululeko Ndlovu, who said that when people speak to the youth, they tend to not give an action plan and rather talk to you like you are a three-year-old. She encouraged attendees to nurture their faith and asked why they are studying what they are and whether they are truly passionate about it. She added, “where there’s no vision, people perish”. She advised that bad habits can be broken and young graduates need to network, get mentors and find people who will always speak well of them. She listed a number of books, music and movies to get hold of regarding success, and told attendees to ‘fail forward’, which is at the heart of knowing which battles to lose in order to win the war. She also spoke of having love for someone who does you wrong – “ ... forgive and let go. Love them and move on. Turn your persecutions into prosperity.” Ndlovu ended by speaking of the need for more love for each other as women, stating: “Your goal is to be kinder to all women folk – pay someone a compliment.”

Ravele gave the last presentation of the afternoon, stating that she lives to inspire young women, and that she hoped to make an impact on the young women listening to her, promising: “I will move you.” Her first piece of advice was, “Don’t wait for someone to take you under their wing – find a good wing and get under it.” Mentorship is important as it sets guidelines for behaviour and instils certain aspirations. Her second piece of advice was to take advantage of every opportunity that comes your way, adding, “don’t see me on TV and think you know me” – Ravele spoke of the challenges she had faced in her career. Her next piece of advice was that successful people start something – you can only get help if you’re doing something about it. She added that until you have truly cleaned something up or sorted out the underlying issues, it will keep cropping up. This brings your own mood down, so you need to get over it and move on for you, not for anyone else. Her statement, “Some of your bosses don’t know how privileged they are to have you work for them,” raised a round of applause from the audience. Ravele explained that you might be in a job you don’t like, but sometimes you have to do what you need to do until you can do what you want to do. On the other hand, some people are building their lives on a base of quicksand, which will get them nowhere. She added that we need to “stop trying to keep up with the Khumalos”, explaining that if you’re struggling to make ends meet, you shouldn’t try to impress others. You need to know who you are, understand it and embrace it. “You will fail. When you do fail, live in it.” She encouraged the attendees to surround themselves with likeminded people who are trying to move ahead, and to let their friends grow. Her final lesson was about spirituality: “It doesn’t matter who your god is ... don’t put people on a pedestal as they will fail you.”

Attendees received a certificate at the end of the day and their enthusiasm was infectious. I wish I had the chance to attend a conference like this in my youth!